Little Lion Part 2

November 9, 2012

The story will start with details too heavy for your tiny mind to hold. From the dark pit where I pleaded for your life and mine. Just moments before you split away from my body and first took breath.

Up from the water, into the new morning. Surrounded by blood, and pain, and love. And an ache that would not go away.

The story will roll through your first year like thunder. It will tell of how we shrunk like two cold stars in a lost galaxy. How we screeched into deep empty space where no-one heard us. And how we drifted into a slipstream, a needle thin orbit that kept us alive.

It will also tell of the love that entwined our souls in golden threads. How I heard the murmur of each heartbeat. How I whispered silky words into your warm neck. How you were safe in the balm of my skin.

One day you will know this was not my design, that I carried a scar from the start. One day I will tell you about the disease that almost swallowed me. How it left me with a shattered body and a brittle mind. I hope you will not see a wounded soldier, but a warrior who tried to be strong  for too long.

The story will turn at the beginning of your second year. It will tell of blossoming and happiness. How you found your firm footing and your brave voice. And though I remained a crooked shadow, you wrapped me in the grace of your small soft hands.

Now you are two. You are so strong, my little lion. You are gentle, my little lamb. You are soaring, my little eagle. Insurrection gravity is wheeling at your wings.

Another year trails off into history. Look how far we’ve come. Can you see that wisp of light? It’s the hope of your bold future.

I don’t know how the story will end. But one day, my son, we will walk in the lightness of a thousand summery days. I will rise with my former strength and glide by your side. For now, this is your time.  Step into the sunlight.

Roar your mighty roar.

And shine.

signature

{ 41 comments… read them below or add one }

Anna Spargo-Ryan November 9, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Deb, you are such an incredible writer. Happy birthday to your little lion.
Anna Spargo-Ryan recently posted..TensesMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 12:36 pm

Thank you Anna!

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 12:37 pm

PS That thank you was extremely heart felt when I wrote it… just so you know… high praise coming from you. x

Reply

Sharon @ Funken Wagnel November 9, 2012 at 6:04 pm

Happy birthday, gorgeous boy!

What a beautiful story, Deb:) I had one water birth, and it was amazing, I do wish all three births could’ve been.

I’m sure your kids will be very proud of you as they learn of your warrior-ness
Sharon @ Funken Wagnel recently posted..Back From SydneyMy Profile

Reply

Sharon @ Funken Wagnel November 9, 2012 at 7:14 pm

Oh, I’m sorry, gorgeous girl! This isn’t the first time I’ve stuffed up a gender, so I’m very sorry if I have offended:(
Sharon @ Funken Wagnel recently posted..Back From SydneyMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 10, 2012 at 12:47 am

He is boy – you were right the first time! ;)

Thank you Sharon – I look forward to catching your post. I hope you’re okay. xx

Reply

Sharon @ Funken Wagnel November 10, 2012 at 10:09 am

Argh! Sorry, sorry! Yep, we’re doing ok:)
Sharon @ Funken Wagnel recently posted..Back From SydneyMy Profile

Reply

Debyl1 November 9, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Your words are so beautiful and show the amazing love of a mama for her child.
They will be a treasure for your gorgeuos boy to hold onto one day.
Thankyou for sharing so openly..
May your little lion have a very Happy Birthday and a life where he can soar like an eagle while keeping the tenderness in heart of a gentle lamb.xx

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 12:38 pm

You are so beautiful, Debbie. I love that you ‘get’ the heart stuff I write about. x

Reply

Cat November 9, 2012 at 6:42 pm

Deb, this is the first introduction I’ve had to your blog and wow what an introduction. I know your words as my own truth. I call my youngest Little Lion too and so much of the first year of both my boy’s lives is such a blur. I can feel your strength, your love and your optimism. Happy birthday to your little man and to you xxx
Cat recently posted..Dear blog…My Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 1:12 pm

Hi Cat! Thank you for such a lovely comment. I’m delighted to ‘meet’ you. xx

Reply

Toushka Lee November 9, 2012 at 7:08 pm

Deb, that was beautiful. I have tears spilling.
<3
Toushka Lee recently posted..Wordless Wednesday – Where I LiveMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Toushka, thank you. xx

Reply

Sara November 9, 2012 at 7:39 pm
Deb November 12, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Thank you dear Sara! xx

Reply

Bec | Bird with a chip November 10, 2012 at 7:10 am

Oh my, Deb. Beautiful. Just beautiful. X
Bec | Bird with a chip recently posted..Phase Three: From Glow Worm to Big GirlMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 12:39 pm

Thank you so much Bec! xx

Reply

Ulyana November 10, 2012 at 11:44 pm

Every time I come back to your beautiful corner of the internet, you strike me with your words. Your ability to craft them, to tell them.. And it always takes me so long to catch my breath afterwards. Always. xx

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Thank you Ulyana. So appreciate your words.x

Reply

Naomi Bulger November 11, 2012 at 1:13 pm

This is gloriously, beautifully written. And it has been wonderful to see, in your life and in your words, the healing that this little lion man has brought to you, as he blossoms. Happy birthday precious boy!
Naomi Bulger recently posted..Art + wordsMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 1:24 pm

My dear Naomi, thank you for your beautiful comment! xx

Reply

Jill November 11, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Deb, you have such a way with words! Happy birthday to both of you.
Jill recently posted..Kerala backwaters and other ‘stuff’My Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Thanks Jill. xx :)

Reply

Catherine Rodie Blagg November 12, 2012 at 7:26 am

You have such a poetic way of writing, Deb! So beautiful.
Happy birthday to your little man xx
Catherine Rodie Blagg recently posted..What you focus on expandsMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 12, 2012 at 1:27 pm

Thank you Catherine. Little man had a very happy birthday. :)

Reply

Laney @ Crash Test Mummy November 13, 2012 at 3:17 pm

What a beautiful birthday tribute for your little lion. You make me wish I could write.
Laney @ Crash Test Mummy recently posted..Crash Test: A mindful ChristmasMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 13, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Thank you, Laney. xx

Reply

Vicky November 13, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Exquisite. Breathtaking. You write so lyrically. Xxx
Vicky recently posted..I Heart My Body. I want you to Heart your body too LauraMy Profile

Reply

Deb November 13, 2012 at 9:58 pm

Thank you so much, Vicky. x

Reply

Joy November 14, 2012 at 9:41 am

Oh, Deb!! This is truly lovely, so heartfelt and full of a mother’s love. Happy, happy Birthday to your little lion!

Reply

Deb November 14, 2012 at 10:48 am

Thank you dear Joy! xx

Reply

Gill November 14, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Deb, I am struggling to get across how wonderful I found this piece of writing…It really is special. The crooked shadow, a story that rolls like thunder, the little lion…I loved very word.

Reply

Deb November 15, 2012 at 5:42 pm

Oh Gill, thank you so much. Means a lot – especially from a magnificent writer like yourself. Thanks also for your email – have bumped my head in the last 24 hours and I’m gradually getting back some clarity! – so will reply! xxx

Reply

Gill November 14, 2012 at 5:55 pm

This is going to have to go up on my writer wall too btw…x

Reply

Deb November 15, 2012 at 5:43 pm

An honour! xx

Reply

Twitchy November 16, 2012 at 12:18 am

Happy Birthday to your boy, my boy just had his on the weekend too. Scorpions. Lions. Your words are so marvellously evocative I honestly don’t know how you always do it. So clever. xx

Reply

Deb November 16, 2012 at 8:39 pm

Thank you dear Twitchy. I think our boy may be 11 years and 5 days apart. :)

Reply

kelley @ magnetboldtoo November 17, 2012 at 12:10 pm

breathtakingly beautiful.

As always.

xx

Reply

Deb December 4, 2012 at 9:01 pm

You say the loveliest things, Kelley. xxx

Reply

katepickle March 22, 2013 at 10:28 am

I remember exactly when I read this the first time… I was on my phone, sitting in the car, waiting to pick the girls up from school. Such imagery, and beautiful words and feelings explained so well… glad you linked this up so I could read it again and leave a comment.
katepickle recently posted..The Toddler – Real Life WednesdayMy Profile

Reply

Deb May 15, 2013 at 11:03 am

Thank you so much, Kate. (I can’t believe I haven’t responded to this comment, by the way!)

Reply

Leave a Comment

CommentLuv badge

{ 2 trackbacks }

Previous post:

Next post: